Promotional Xmas Photos of Yore

Peter Lorre, 1940

circa 1940: Hungarian born actor Peter Lorre (1904 - 1964) takes a swing at Santa with a baseball bat. (Photo via John Kobal Foundation/Getty Images)

This literally just says, "Peter Lorre prepares to hit Santa with a baseball bat." Which... sure. Is it a still from a movie? Is Peter Lorre just really, really NOT INTO these photo shoots? Does he have a history with Santa Claus? Is it jealousy? Is Mrs. Claus his lover?

Claire Trevor, 1933

(Original Caption) 12/12/1933- Hollywood, CA- Claire Trevor, lovely Fox Films player, doesn't believe in wearing her heart on her sleeve. Says it looks much better on her tummy. Claire found it on the Christmas tree but hasn't revealed its owner.

I must let Informative Caption hold the mic: "Claire Trevor, lovely Fox Films player, doesn't believe in wearing her heart on her sleeve. Says it looks much better on her tummy. Claire found it on the Christmas tree but hasn't revealed its owner." I... cannot top that.

Priscilla Lane, 1941

1941: Hollywood actor Priscilla Lane stands beside a Christmas tree with an armful of holiday presents. (Photo by Hulton Archive/Getty Images)

"Can you take the photo already? My face hurts and I'm going to drop these."

Mitzi Gaynor, 1955

circa 1955: Full-length promotional portrait of American actor Mitzi Gaynor posing as she decorates a Christmas tree with silver tinsel and ornaments. (Photo by Hulton Archive/Getty Images)

Mitzi? You got tinsel on your pants.

Anne Shelton, 1950

22nd December 1950: Popular singer Anne Shelton, the 'forces sweetheart', decorates the Christmas tree at her Dulwich home, with the help of her six year old niece. (Photo by George W. Hales/Fox Photos/Getty Images)

Anne here is decorating her home tree with her niece. In the company of her niece, that is. She's not using her niece as a decoration. IS SHE?

Virginia Gray, 1935

December 1935: Virginia Gray, the Hollywood film star and actress, signed by MGM, is seen preparing herself for the role of St Nicholas so that she can distribute gifts to the children in the area. (Photo by Hulton Archive/Getty Images)

Informative Caption says, "Virginia Gray, the Hollywood film star and actress, signed by MGM, is seen preparing herself for the role of St Nicholas so that she can distribute gifts to the children in the area." This is exactly the outfit I bought for wrapping presents this year.

Julie Haydon, 1937

circa 1937: Julie Haydon, the Hollywood film star and actress, signed by MGM, who appeared in 'Maytime' with Jeanette MacDonald and Nelson Eddy. (Photo by Clarence Paul Richee/Hulton Archive/Getty Images)

"Shh, don't tell, I relabeled some of my sister's gifts so that they'll go to me. She'll never know. Unless YOU tell."

Jackie Gleason

This tree is decorated with Christmas cards, apparently. I can't decide if I think that's a fun idea, or if it looks like it was attacked by a swarm of paper, or... possibly both.

Mary Martin, 1940

American actress Mary Martin (1913 - 1990) dressed as a saucy Santa Claus, circa 1940. (Photo by Silver Screen Collection/Hulton Archive/Getty Images)

Before she was Peter Pan, she was Sultry Santa.

Shirley Temple, 1935

American child star Shirley Temple holding a large teddy bear in front of a Christmas tree, circa 1935. (Photo by Silver Screen Collection/Hulton Archive/Getty Images)

"Why, yes, Mr. Cuddlesworth, you may have this dance."

Nat King Cole and Natalie

UNITED STATES - JANUARY 01: USA Photo of Nat King COLE, Nat KIng Cole reading with daughter Natalie Cole (Photo by Echoes/Redferns)

Aw. This is so cute. I barely even notice the tree in the back; they're just hanging out, reading some music, snuggling.

The Beatles

Whoever said "The Beatles don't grow on trees" didn't know about this photo.

Ava Gardner, 1960

Full-length shot of Ava Gardner (1922-1990), US actress, wearing a dress decorated with Christmas trees, standing by a fireplace, above which hangs a Christmas stocking, in a studio portrait, circa 1960. (Photo by Silver Screen Collection/Getty Images)

"I repaint this wall every month to match my seasonal apron."

Elizabeth Taylor, 1955

Elizabeth Taylor (1932-2011), British actress, posing in a yellow dress alongside a white artificial Christmas tree amidst a variety of objects, including a television set, a radio and giftwrapped Christmas presents, in a studio portrait, circa 1955. (Photo by Silver Screen Collection/Getty Images)

This is the invisible tree I mentioned. Somebody whiffed their set design here. You barely know it's there.

Deanna Durbin, 1945

Canadian actress Deanna Durbin as a Christmas tree fairy in a peach-coloured dress, decorated with baubles and tinsel, circa 1945. (Photo by Silver Screen Collection/Getty Images)

Apparently she's dressed AS the tree.

Janice Carter, 1950

Janice Carter decorating Christmas tree in publicity portrait, Circa 1950. (Photo by Getty Images)

"What if I got bangs? What would it look like? Maybe if I just put this there..."

Shirley Jones, 1963

Shirley Jones decorating a Christmas tree in publicity portrait, Circa 1963. (Photo by 20th Century-Fox/Getty Images)

This is so MOODY.

Shirley Jones, c 1960

American singer and actress Shirley Jones sitting beside a Christmas tree, circa 1960. (Photo by Silver Screen Collection/Getty Images)

I think this is the same shot, just with... a whole lot more light.

Diana Dors, 1955

British actress Diana Dors (1931 - 1984) sitting by a Christmas tree, wearing a santa outfit, circa 1955. (Photo by Silver Screen Collection/Getty Images)

Maybe I'll make this my holiday card.

Patti Page, 1955

UNSPECIFIED - circa 1955: (AUSTRALIA OUT) Photo of American singer Patti Page (1927-2013) posed in front of a Christmas tree and presents circa 1955. (Photo by GAB Archive/Redferns)

"Look! I blew my nose all over it!"

May Britt, 1956

Swedish actress May Britt (Maybritt Wilkens) posing dressed as Santa Claus in her flat in Rome. Rome, 1956 (Photo by Ivo Meldolesi/Mondadori via Getty Images)

"Behold my Christmas twig!"

Deanna Durbin Demonstrating Tree Tips, 1944

(Original Caption) 10/24/1944-Hollywood, CA- With an scute shortage of all kinds of Christmas tree ornaments facing us this year, screen star, Deanna Durbin, comes forth with a suggestion for home-made decorations that are simple and yet will dress a tree attractively.

"Golly, I don't think this food is shelf stable, but I'll sure try!"

Ingrid Bergman and Son Posing with Sweden's Light Queen

(Original Caption) Light Queen Visits Ingrid and Son. Rome: Sweden's "Light Queen," Kerstin Ornoe (right), complete with a crown and silk dress, shares the spotlight under a huge tree with movie star Ingrid Bergman and her son, three-year-old Robertino. Ingrid, who is married to movie director Roberto Rossellini, had the "Queen" as a special guest at a Christmas Party. The Light Queen was in Italy to attend official "Lucia" festivals.

"Is ANYONE concerned about her wearing candles next to a tree? Anyone at all?"

Cast of National Velvet Television Show Decorating Christmas Tree

(Original Caption) Final touch...to the Christmas tree ready's the National Velvet family for the big day. Lori Martin, Ann Doran, James McCallion, Arthur Space, Carole Wells and Joey Scott star in the Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Television series.

Nothing says "our show is about horse racing and a dairy farm" like decorating a tree. (I did not know they turned this into a TV show. It had 58 episodes... in only two seasons. That's a LOT OF WORK.)

Boris Karloff with Ginger Rogers, 1932

(Original Caption) 12/1932- Los Angeles, CA- Boris Karloff, of "Frankenstein" fame, and red-haired Ginger Rogers, 1932 Wampas Baby star, seen as they attended a gala Christmas Party at Los Angeles a few days ago. A throng of 200 motion picture celebrities and writers greeted the baby stars who were presented to them by "Little Billy", midget motion picture actor.

I would love to know what Ginger Rogers is thinking here. She seems hypnotized.

Bela Lugosi as Santa Climbing Over Fence, 1939

(Original Caption) 12/1939- Hollywood, CA- We'll bet you didn't recognize this Santa Claus as one of the ace horror men of the screen, Bela Lugosi. Bela says it is the nicest characterization he has ever played.

Poor Santa. We make him slide down chimneys AND climb fences?

Jean Simmons Decorating with US Bonds, 1955

(Original Caption) 12/4/1955-Washington, DC- British actress, Jean Simmons, currntly playing in the cinema version of, "Guys and Dolls", takes time out to wish everyone a Merry Christmas while decorating her Christmas tree with US Savings Bonds. Ineligable to buy them herself, Jean has purchased several for her American friends. She thinks it's wonderful to be able to share in your country's future through savings.

This caption read in part, "Ineligable to buy [U.S. Bonds] herself, Jean has purchased several for her American friends. She thinks it's wonderful to be able to share in your country's future through savings." You heard it here first, kids.

Mary Pickford Trims Christmas Tree

(Original Caption) 12/5/1937- Beverly Hills, CA- Assited by Little Johanna Randall (whom she is holding) and Muriel Wisdom, Mary Pickford, keeps up a Hollywood, CA, tradition by trimming the first outdoor Christmas Tree at Beverly Hills. Miss Pickford, who for 12 years has been the honorary chairman of the Holiday Beautification movement created the pre-holiday activities of the movie colony when she began to trim the tree.

Who's gonna tell her that ladder isn't tall enough?

Elvis Reading his Draft Notice, 1957

(Original Caption) 12/20/1957-Memphis, TN: Rock 'n' roll crooner Elvis Presley reads an unexpected "greeting" -- a notice to report to military induction on January 20th. The idol of the teenagers is scheduled to begin making a film on the same day, however, so a studio official says that he will ask for a temporary postponement of Presley's induction. If Presley is not available for the movie, the studio and the producer will possibly lose between $300,000 and $350,000.

Ahem: "Rock 'n' roll crooner Elvis Presley reads an unexpected "greeting" -- a notice to report to military induction on January 20th. The idol of the teenagers is scheduled to begin making a film on the same day, however, so a studio official says that he will ask for a temporary postponement of Presley's induction. If Presley is not available for the movie, the studio and the producer will possibly lose between $300,000 and $350,000." He did enter the army in 1958, so I guess it didn't work.