Queen Victoria Marries Prince Albert, 1840

10th February 1840: Queen Victoria (1819 - 1901) and Prince Albert (1819 - 1861) on their return from the marriage service at St James's Palace, London. Original Artwork: Engraved by S Reynolds after F Lock. (Photo by Rischgitz/Getty Images)

At last, the time has come: I am rewinding so far back into history that I do not have contemporaneous photos of the event. Get ready for engravings! Let me just say that this is the only look we have at her bouquet and it is DECIDEDLY TOO SMALL. What is your deal, Victorians?!? Also would be interested to understand why the engraver here decided that the best background for the happy couple would be a bunch of barrels.

Queen Victoria Marries Prince Albert, 1840

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Historia/Shutterstock (7665079cf) Queen Victoria in Bridal Dress On Her Wedding Day - 10th February 1840 1840 Historical Collection 179

This dress IS lovely -- you'll see it in the flesh (er, in the fabric) shortly -- but do you think other Victorians complained to each other that they hated those droopy segments everyone was draping around their ears? "They really fight with my new ear bobs, Elizabeth."

Queen Victoria Marries Prince Albert, 1840

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Historia/Shutterstock (9839625a) Queen Victoria Marrying Her Cousin Prince Albert Son of Ernest I Duke of Saxe-coburg-gotha in the Little Chapel Royal St. James's London. Engraving by W. H Overend in 'The Illustrated London News Jubilee Number', 13 June 1887, Page 9 Marriage of Victoria and Albert - 10 Feb 1840

"I feel like my engraving is missing something up near the Archbishop. There's this blank space I need to fill." "Why don't you just stick a BUNCH of giant throw pillows in there?" "Alastair, you're a genius!!"

Queen Victoria Marries Prince Albert, 1840

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Historia/Shutterstock (7665092au) Marriage Victoria Marries Albert 1840 Historical Collection 26

These pillows make several appearances, so they must have actually been part of Her Majesty's Bridal Decor. I'm sure they were useful if someone swooned!

Queen Victoria Marries Prince Albert, 1840

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Historia/Shutterstock (7665111hl) Two Scenes From Queen Victoria's Reign: 1 Her Wedding to Albert 1840 2 with Albert and Children various Historical Collection 43

At some point later, the previous piece of art was turned into this bit of royal swag with the wedding portrait on top, and a family portrait there on the bottom. This has a lot happening, and I hope some of the portraits of folks along the edges are just pictures of total randoms that the swag-maker threw in to see if anyone noticed.

''A Century of Queens' Wedding Dresses'' Exhibition

404666 03: A mannequin of Britain's Queen Victoria, wearing her wedding dress, stands in front of a model of Queen Elizabeth (R) April 30, 2002 at the launch of the exhibition "A Century of Queens'' Wedding Dresses 1840 - 1947" at Kensington Palace in London. The dresses are on display for the first time as part of the Queen's Golden Jubilee celebrations. Queen Victoria married Prince Albert in 1840. The dress was made by one of the Queens dressmakers, Mrs Bettans from silk trimmed with lace. (Photo by Sion Touhig/Getty Images)

Here she is! This is from a 2002 exhibit called "A Century of Queens' Wedding Dresses, 1840 - 1947" at Kensington Palace. Informative Caption says that "the dresses are on display for the first time as part of the Queen's Golden Jubilee celebrations," and yes, the queen in THAT sentence is Elizabeth II, whose gown is in the background. This must have been an EXTREMELY ENJOYABLE exhibit and I wish I'd seen it.

A dress worn by Britain's Queen Victoria on her wedding day to Prince Albert in 1840 is pictured in Kensington Palace in central London, on March 20, 2012, during a photocall to showcase a GBP12m (14.4m euros/19m USD) restoration of the historic palace. The restoration also features an exhibition of dresses worn by Diana, Princess of Wales. AFP PHOTO/MIGUEL MEDINA (Photo credit should read MIGUEL MEDINA/AFP via Getty Images)

And THIS dates from an exhibit at Kensington Palace in 2012 "to showcase a GBP12m (14.4m euros/19m USD) restoration of the historic palace. The restoration also features an exhibition of dresses worn by Diana, Princess of Wales," and I may have seen some of this, depending on what is still at Kensington Palace and/or has been rotated in there over the last six years or so. (When Heather and I were there in 2016, there WAS a big Victoria exhibit but I don't think her wedding gown was part of it. I do remember that she was quite short.)

Queen Victoria's wedding shoes and stockings

Shoes and stockings said to have been worn by Queen Victoria at her wedding in 1840. The shoes have silk satin uppers with ribbon stitched across the vamp and ribbons to tie around the ankle. The stockings are with royal cipher. (Photo by Museum of London/Heritage Images/Getty Images)

Informative Caption is legitimately informative here, letting us know that these are "[s]hoes and stockings said to have been worn by Queen Victoria at her wedding in 1840. The shoes have silk satin uppers with ribbon stitched across the vamp and ribbons to tie around the ankle. The stockings are with royal cipher." These shoes do not look comfortable!

Victoria's Wedding Cake

The cake made for the wedding of Queen Victoria and Prince Albert of Saxe-Coburg and Gotha, February 1840, (Photo by Hulton Archive/Getty Images)

OKAY, these flags are very nifty, but what did it TASTE like? Glad you asked, because in looking this up, I discovered that this drawing is a total lie. Also: It was a fruitcake and it's also how they invented royal icing.