Prince Harry Meets Row2Recovery Team in Henley

Here's Harry at something called the River and Rowing Museum, which I would probably love, as I LOVE a museum and also I love men who row. And pointing. And gingers.

Joan Collins and Prince Charles

In my imagination, these two had a rollicking affair for three crazy weeks in the 70s. And she just reminded him what went down on Capri.

Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall and son Tom Parker-Bowles

Camz apparently won a wad of cash -- PICTURED! -- off her son Tom at the races at The Cheltenham Festival this week. He does NOT look pleased. It's also terrifically convenient that Princes Charles was his godfather a full 30 years before becoming his stepfather. It's not that surprising -- I get the impression that if you can get a royal to agree to be your child's godparent in Britain, you do it -- but that must have been a rather awkward christening as I assume it was full of longing glances over the font.

Camilla

The tweedy, sport-y look suits Camilla, but once again she is wearing a wreath of some sort, this time of fur.

Princess Anne, Autumn Phillips, Zara Phillips

Autumn Phillips, in the middle there, is married to Anne's eldest, Peter. She's Canadian and they got married on my birthday, so I love her now. I also remember looking her up on Wikipedia for something else, because I recall this amazing tidbit: "Autumn attended the 2003 Canadian Grand Prix, where she met Peter Phillips – who was, at the time, working for WilliamsF1 – though she did not know until six weeks later, when she saw him on television, that he was Queen Elizabeth II's grandson." THAT is something amazing to learn on TV. Of the three of them, she easily looks the chic-est. Anne looks like your sternest governess and I do not understand Zara's hat.

Princess Anne

This coat is jaunty. I've decided that Princess Anne leads a secret double life as an assassin. You can see that, too, right?

Zara Phillips and Mike Tindal

The day prior. One British publication that I read -- I can't remember which, possibly all -- deemed this coat "unfortunate" and I must agree. I KNOW you just had a baby, but send someone out to get a coat that fits you, Zara. In fact, go TO Zara. They will have something.

Zara Phillips

This is also...not great. Oh, Zara.

Princess Beatrice

"I am trying very, very hard not to laugh right now."

Prince Edward

It was Edward's 50th birthday this week, and he was given a cake in front of an elevator, just as we all most ardently wish would happen on our own birthdays.

Countess Of Wessex

"Kate's out of town. Can you...go out more? We're asking EVERYONE. Thanks!"

The Prince Of Wales & Duchess Of Cornwall and Mrs Patmore

Here's your promised puppy and HE IS CUTE. I also just realized that the person holding his leash -- or, since he's a British dog, his lead -- is MRS PATMORE. THIS SLIDESHOW HAS EVERYTHING.

Princess Letizia of Spain Attends Audiences at Zarzuela Palace

I feel like all the pictures we ever get of Letizia, she is purposefully striding somewhere, like an ADA on a Law and Order we don't get in the States.

Queen Mathilde meets Queen Elizabeth II On Official Trip To London

Including King Philippe and Queen Mathilde of Belgium popping in to see Liz at Buck P on a visit. A) Mathilde's shoes are FABULOUS and in fact her entire outfit is good, and (b) I enjoy that the Queen appears to be talking about how much she hates the rug they're all standing on. Maybe she was. We, as ever, do not know her life.

The Queen And Duke Of Edinburgh Visit Royal Holloway

I find it quite adorable that Philip has matched his tie to her Majesty's frock. Oh, you two.

Royals Round-Up, Week of March 10, 2014

A LOT happened this week, in addition to all the shenanigans to be covered herein -- which include cake! Puppies! The exchange of monies between mother and son! AND Joan Collins! To catch you up on the stuff we've already talked about, first, though: Harry and Cressida are out in public -- and by "out in public," I mean, "are officially together at events sanctioned by the palace," and we speculated about it, like, a lot. "Sources" claim Kate is giving Cressy lots of friendly advice, which is nice if it's true, although it's not like palace sources are going to be all, "BITCHES HATE EACH OTHER, WOW YOU GUYS IT'S GONNA GET JUICY CAN'T WAIT GET OUT THE POPCORN!!!!" Although I firmly think it's totally possible that they DO like each other just fine, how the hell are we supposed to decide how they feel until they're photographed together in public and we can spend like four hours poring over the photos to interpret their body language like the Royal Body Language Experts we've self-trained to become? LATE EDITION GOSSIP: The Telegraph indicates Cressida is not ready to get married; this piece is actually quite interesting and makes me like her more. Wills and Kate have an event on Monday, so meet me here and we'll talk about if they seem sufficiently tan for two people who've just been in the Maldives for a week while everyone complained about them, even people who actually really like them (like me! I feel like I need to restate for the record that I actually love W&K. I just don't love their decision-making at the moment and I kind of worry that someone painted the inside of their new Kensington Palace apartments with paint that's slowly making them bonkers). People wore HATS and Harry wore suits and was harassed by street signs. A lot of folks, including Pippa and Fergie (??) went to David Frost's memorial in smart, dark clothing. Heather and I went to England in January to research our new book, The Royal We, and we wrote about it and shared lots of pictures on our book blog.