Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue Party

Tyra Banks

Tyra was the first Black woman to land the SI Swimsuit cover, so of course she's here. And of course she looks like she did her makeup by reaching into her charcoal grill and rubbing the detritus all over her eyelids.

Chrissy Teigen

Chrissy's outfit is really cute. I don't love her cover; honestly, I'm not sure how good a model I actually think she is, although I am sure I'm in the minority on that.

Hunter McGrady

That's a great dress on Hunter. Her cover is very effective , EXCEPT that I think they did some funky shit to her eyes, because one of them looks... just like they glued it in there.

Kate Upton, Lily Aldridge

NEW YORK, NEW YORK - MAY 16: Kate Upton (L) and Lily Aldridge attend the 2024 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue launch party at Hard Rock Cafe - Times Square on May 16, 2024 in New York City. (Photo by Gotham/FilmMagic)

Kate has done the cover four times, including this year. LIly's dress is more interesting to me for NOT trying to look like a swimsuit.

Gayle King

Gayle loves a colorful print, but she maybe could've avoided one that looks like someone threw paint on her? She is your final model this year is Gayle, whose photo kind of looks like nobody checked to see if her hair and makeup were done. That suit is cute though.

Molly Sims

This seems like a very unsurprising choice of outfit for a swimsuit party.

Jasmine Sanders

This is very... saloon proprietress, but make it fashion.

Madisin Rian

If you have to drape yourself in fur to survive being out and about in your pleather bikini, maybe... go shopping?

Achieng Agutu

I cannot pretend to know what this is, but if she can use those two divots to hold champagne flutes, then it's all good.

Sixtine Rouyre

Will she change her name to Seventine next year?

Roshumba

There are so many good elements here, but that harness is sadly not one of them.

Camille Kostek

Oooh, this looks great on her.

Leyna Bloom

Leyna is the first trans woman to hit the cover, and I am with her here right until the thick plastic shoes. We were 95 percent there.

Danielle Herrington

She became the third Black woman to be on the cover, behind Tyra and Beyonce. That's pretty good company. I hope they all went out for cocktails. I also hope the bandages holding her dress together hung in there.

Halima Aden

She was the first model to wear a hijab on the mag. I wish there was a little more coordination throughout here, or maybe... some unifying sparkle, or something.

Georgina Burke

Usually the nipple flowers are on the INSIDE.

Martha

And here we have our oldest model; she was on the cover last year and is on it again this year in a group shot, I believe, of the legends? She looks very... taupe.

Chanel Iman

Ehhh. That top part looks like it's clamped there, somehow.

Brooks Nader

Girl, no.

Christie Brinkley

Girl, YES.