Doja Cat

Nothing says "I cannot wait to eat a variety of dips and salty dip-delivery-platforms" like this outfit.

Ciara

Do her cups runneth over with... tiny metal claws?

Ciara and Russell Wilson

Ciara LOVES wearing Seattle's particular neon green, so if Russell Wilson lands somewhere else next season it will be very sad. Not that many teams have interesting colors. She'd look great in Steelers black and gold. I'M JUST SAYING.

Taryn Manning

This is the very comfortable Golden Girls version of Doja Cat's outfit.

Melody Thornton

A Pussycat Doll in the wild, who isn't Ashley! (Or is it Amanda?) I can't decide which is making my eyelids twitch more: the combination of her low-rise jeans and whatever that hosiery is, or a cropped corset that's giving me a Care Bear stare. That poor creature has just learned how Charmin has defamed their kind.

Camile Kostek

Were they giving away tiny corsets like candy? (Camille is dating Gronk.)

Normani

Well. Is a dress like chewing gum being stretched to its limit an aesthetic I would ask for again? No. But is she handling this all with panache? Yes.

Normani

It was more interesting than denim bootaloons, anyway.

Nikki and Brie Bella

Not a TON of breathable fabrics happening in this photo.

Quavo

The jacket was a welcome piece of flair.

Jon Hamm

"... Is this... NOT Sundance?"

Nicole Scherzinger

Cut your strings, Nicole! Tie them off and snip them! Save yourself!

Chrishell Stause

She looks very cute, and was photographed at this party with Jason Oppenheim. I hope she's not trying that again.

Amanda Kloots

Amanda needs Uzo Aduba to take her shoe shopping. Uzo could also help out with the outfit, frankly. A cropped jacket AND a bra top AND pleated shorts is too much for one person.

Julianne Hough

Maybe Julianne and Amanda should have traded jackets. Well, I don't think it would have helped Amanda, but it MIGHT have made this more interesting.

Machine Gun Kelly

Well, he's certainly not under-dressed.

Halsey

The best thing I can say here is that I like their boots. The rest is... honestly kind of a punt by Halsey standards, no football pun intended (at least not by me; maybe they knowingly punted).

Mary J Blige

What better weekend to release new music than when you're performing at halftime? (I was glad nobody busted out anything but the classics there.) Mary J's styling was a bit more interesting when she was making the acting rounds, and I miss that. Her boots aren't quite having the same color conversation as her dress is.

Lindsay Ell and Mickey Guyton

I like Lindsay's boots. I want to hurl Mickey Guyton's dress into the sea. Emotionally, that is.

Audrina Patridge

"Hi guys. I am not Chrishell Stause. Unless... you think I might be, in which case, would it be rude to play along?"

Kendall Toole

Oh dear, it's my least favorite Peloton instructor (note: this might not be true, but she's in there somewhere), and she's doing some kind of mid-SATC Carrie Bradshaw cosplay.

J Balvin

This is Prada and it made me think we're going to get a collab soon between Miuccia and a white-collar prison.

Tinashe

She looks like she hugged an alien.

Emily Ratajkowski

For a model, she really doesn't always... give the clothes her all, you know?

Megan Thee Stallion

She seems weirdly tentative, too. Or impatient. I wish I had a single original piece of commentary to give to the bra-as-shirt trend, but after so many of them, I'm fresh out. It's a bra. It's not even pretending. I guess I admire its honesty.

Tinashe

This is like if you designed an ice dance to an older Christina Aguilera song.

Tinashe

She also popped by Rihanna's Fenty event, which was not Super Bowl related but was in the same town so let's call it a win. And she wore sleeping bags on her ankles. If she gets cold, can she pluck portable sleeves from them too?

Gwen

She's heading into Madonna territory for me, in the sense that I think she's trying too hard to be The Gwen of the Aughts and ignoring that there might be cooler, more chill pastures out there to explore.

Gwen

"And THAT'S my pitch for a revival of Cats. See you on Broadway!"

People Partied at the Super Bowl in Outfits As Questionable As You Probably Expected

There's a cartoon bear here that REALLY doesn't deserve it.