Madonna
The BOY TOY belt is such a statement. She so obviously owns her own pleasure and is no one's toy; it was the piece de resistance on an outfit that pushed every limit (of the era) with a big old wink and a licked lip.
This outfit was everything back then. Madonna was just THE COOLEST, to me. I didn't even really think about the lingerie aspects of it. I just saw the gloves and the necklaces and the hair and the confidence and I wanted it all.
Billy Idol
"Well I DID say it was a nice day for a white wedding."
Cyndi Lauper
I wish we'd had a color picture of this available. Trust: It was bright.
Dan Aykroyd, Bette Midler
Bette looks like she and Dan are chaperoning the Prom in a way designed to make the kids VERY embarrassed.
Nick Rhodes and Simon Le Bon
I thought you'd enjoy the 1984 version of a screen grab. Oh, yes, and the feathered mullets.
Diana Ross
Yes Miss Ross, you SHOULD wear these silky velveteen cocktail pajamas.
Cher
This felt like the right moment to slam us into the color photos. I did NOT recall Cher ever bleaching her hair, AND YET. Also her eye makeup is perfect with it. Cher's face really is a marvel. Her bone structure is epic. She is wearing beaded earrings nearly as long as her head and she carries them.
In case you wanted to see her whole outfit. I have no idea why she decided to wear a lace ribbon around her head. I've decided she picked at a zit and it went poorly.
Tina Turner
NOBODY PUTS TINA IN A CORNER.
Robert Downey Jr., Anthony Michael Hall, David Lee Roth, and Sonia Braga
RDJ and AMH look like very clammy teen douchebros, which in 1984 they almost certainly were.
David Lee Roth and Sonia Braga
Obviously this outfit is bananas -- he's dressed as a sofa in a Naples condo building's social room -- but the gold loafers really do seal it perfectly.
Valerie Bertinelli and Eddie Van Halen
Their matching hair delights me.
Alice Cooper and Sheryl Cooper
I did not recognize Alice.
Richard Belzer
I ALSO did not recognize Richard Belzer. Do we need Sam Rockwell to play Young Richard Belzer in The Young Richard Belzer Story? Although, Richard Belzer has regularly appeared on Alex Jones's radio show, which is a HARD PASS FROM ME, BELZ, so I don't actually want this movie to happen. I just want everyone to agree that if it DID happen, Sam Rockwell would be IT.
Dale Bozzio
Dale was in a band called Missing Persons, and performed with Frank Zappa. She also feels like an early Lady Gaga influence to me.
Juice Newton
JUICE! "Queen of Hearts" is such a great song, and I believe I owned those gloves. (A few years later, though, as a Madonna Halloween costume.)
Terri Nunn and Kevin Cronin of REO Speedwagon
Terri Nunn is of course from Berlin, and Kevin here does not appear to have taken her breath away.
Kevin, however, clearly could not fight this feeling any longer.
I just had to end on this shot. It's SO DORKY. If you were his family, and you threw him a roast for a milestone birthday, you BETTER have used this as the poster.