Slovenia: Flag bearer Vesna Fabjan, cross-country skiing

Twitter wasn't that wild about the lime green on Slovenia here, but I have to say: I am feeling it. At least it's a CHOICE, and in a giant stadium like that, there's someting to be said for making sure everyone takes notice. I also suddenly want key lime pie, and that's a win for ME, too, so I'm gonna endorse this.

Bulgaria: Flag bearer Radoslav Yankov

Bulgaria spiced up the green from its flag, but otherwise stuck to its national colors. The color combo on them is a LITTLE Elf On The Shelf. But their flag bearer, a snowboarder, appears to be really good-looking. I mean, it's worth noting.

Ireland: Flag bearer Seamus O'Connor

I do think it's probably for the best that Ireland leaned away from the orange and green combo. Navy looks great with it. Also, Seamus, the flag bearer, was Ireland's first snowboarding rep in 2014 at the ripe old age of 16.

Togo: Flag bearer Mathilde Amivi Petitjean

Seriously, bright green is THE THING right now, y'all. The flag-bearer here is a cross-country skiier who used to compete for France until 2013, when Togo was like, "Hey, you were born here, and we need people." True facts: In her shoes, would totally take that chance and not care if I finished 68th out of 75 (which she did in Sochi) if it meant going to the Olympics.

Hungary: Flag bearer Konrad Nagy

Konrad up there is a speed skater who, per Wikipedia, "is the current holder of the Hungarian records in 1000, 1500, 3000, 5000 and 10000 metres." So he's The Guy On Blades up there, is what I'm saying. The uniforms here look a bit like a bummer of a split-pea soup situation.

Nigeria: Flag bearer Akuoma Omeoga, bobsled

Nigeria's outfits are fantastic, and this is its first year in the Winter Olympics. I'm sure it's so fun to be out there in a huge group, like the U.S. and others, but imagine how moving to be just one of a handful of people representing your entire nation. Goosebumps.

South Africa: Flag bearer Connor Wilson

Connor is South Africa's only athlete this year. He's studying to be a vet in Vermont, and he USED to be a show jumper until his horse got super sick (perhaps the interest in veterinary sciences started there), at which point he switched to skiing just for fun.  And now he gets to wear a good coat and be THE PERSON out there. I hope he got hugged a lot.

Italy: Flag bearer Arianna Fontana

Italy is like, "It's COLD HERE. Just order some big puffer coats and we'll put some color in the scarves."

Brazil: Flag bearer Edson Bindilatti

They look very nice, and also, I feel like the Swedish team -- wherever it is (I didn't have a photo?) -- must be wondering if this was one of their rejected designs.

The Netherlands

They are reliably orange, making them my son Dylan's favorite team. He probably thinks they're Clemson. (Also, my Olympic boyfriend Sven Kramer didn't carry the flag, which is FINE, but... HOW. He just became the most decorated speed skater in Olmypic history! It seemed so likely! SVEN!)

Canada: Flag bearers Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir

TESSA AND SCOTT. I love the Shibs for the U.S., but Tessa and Scott are so electrifying on the ice. And Canada is reliably well-clad at these things. Aces all around.

Turkey: Flag bearer Fatih Arda İpcioğlu

This flag-bearer is the first Turkish ski jumper EVER, so yes, sir, you go ahead and take that banner. These jackets are legitimately cute and you could sell those anywhere.

Spain: Flag bearer Lucas Eguibar

Somehow Spain's stuff makes them all look like a gigantic racing pit crew.

Timor Leste: Flag bearer Yohan Goncalves Goutt

These guys ALSO kinda look like they could pit your racecar.

It seems like a good time to pause and note that each nation was escorted in by a woman who carried their name on a... snowy branch, I guess? Those earmuffs are fantastic.

Switzerland

These are fine. Pleasantly neutral. Har-har.

Korea: Flag bearers Hwang Chung Gum (NK) and Won Yun-jong (SK)

What an incredible situation this was. The athletes from the Koreas marched under a unified flag, and I don't think anyone needed Katie Couric to tell them of the significance there. There was apparently something of a language barrier present, but the athletes and spectators all seemed to find this quite moving. I would LOVE to know what questions these competitors asked each other; what do they know of each others lives, and what did they want to learn? The women's hockey team is competing as a blended unit, as well, and that must be a fascinating locker room experience. And I hope a good one for them all.

Yuna Kim

Beloved South Korean ice-skater Yuna Kim lit the torch, and looked so lovely up there.

Her coat is fantastic, also. It was VERY TV-friendly as she skated up there.

Czech Republic

Sure!

China

I would buy that scarf for SURE. The scarves are the true heroes.

Olympic Athletes of Russia

Do you think there were color restrictions on these uniforms, so that they didn't echo the Russian flag at all? (In case you weren't aware: Because Russia was banned due to the massive doping scandal, Russian athletes could apply to compete under the Olympic flag.)

Olympics Opening Ceremony, Pyeongchang, South Korea - 09 Feb 2018

Ice blue, and ombre: It works.

Finland

So, wait: Finland went with TOTALLY different color schemes and designs for the men and the women? And then I guess they split up by gender to walk? The men look totally normal and then the women look a bit like children's PJs. MAKE A DECISION, FINLAND.

Serbia

HELLO SIR. YOUR NAME PLEASE? (Also, that's a GOOD coat. And flattering.)

Thailand: Flag bearer Mark Charloung

I have no problems here.

Eritrea: Flag bearer Shannon Abeda

I think this is Eritrea's first year at the Winter Games, also. I enjoy that they all went with different colored pants, and embraved a vibrant scarf.

Germany: Flag bearer Eric Frenzel

Germany appears to have given zero shits about cute coats. Fair enough, Germany.

Australia: Flag bearer Scotty James

Australia is like, "Oh, who cares, we're DRESSED and SHINY!"

New Zealand: Flag bearer Beau-James Wells

Informative caption ahoy. Since 2004, the New Zealand flag bearers always wear the team's feather kakahu (cloak), called Te Mahutonga, which "translates from Maori to represent the constellation of the Southern Cross" and which is meant to confer extra Mana upon the wearer. And here I was, just thinking it's groovy.

Bermuda

"WHY can't we invent a signature Bermuda TROUSER?!"

Tonga: Flag bearer Pita Taufatofua

You did not think I would SKIP Pita, did you? I love this gentleman. First, he knows what the world wants. Second, he worked hard for that bod, so show it OFF, son. Third, he switched disciplines to cross-country skiing, and if you think that sounds like a lark, let me tel you: There is nothing more miserable than cross-country skiing BADLY. Because, and I have done this, it's basically just cross-country shuffling. And it's HIDEOUS. So, trust, he didn't take that on lightly.

Great Britain: Flag bearer Lizzy Yarnold (skeleton)

The Brits look very bright and festive. Kevin and I were discussing whether luge or skeleton is more dangerous, and we decided that skeleton looks more terrifying, but that luge might be trickier because you can't see as easily? Then again, you also aren't going HEAD FIRST DOWN A GIANT ICE CHUTE, so.

Norway

Norway is also right on theme.

Japan

I'm sure that's red but it almost looks red-orange under the lights. I like the scarves, and I REALLY like the white boots with laces that match the coats. Well thought-out, Japan.

U.S.A.: Flag bearer Erin Hamlin

Sigh. And then the U.S. First, four-time Olympians Erin Hamlin and Shani Davis were apparently in a deadlock after the team voted on who should carry the flag, so they flipped a coin. Shani was mad pissed that they decided that way, and loudly complained to the media about it, and skipped the ceremony (he claims he was going to anyway UNLESS he won, which... I mean, maybe if it wasn't that important to you, then be cool with her doing it?). I feel for Hamlin. She deserved it. But so did he: Davis is also the first black athlete to win an individual gold at the Winter Olympics (in 2006), and with how predominantly white the Winter Games are perceived to be, Davis would've been a great representative up front to inspire future generations of athletes of all ethnicities. And it does seem wimpy to back out on the tough choice and flip for it. My question is: Why didn't they just have both of them do it, a la Virtue and Moir? Wouldn't that have been a celebration of both women and PoC?

Those sweaters are really cute, and the jackets are good, but WHY are they all wearing gigantic fringed suede paws? What was Ralph Lauren thinking?

Perhaps this says, "I don't know what Ralph was thinking, but I'm pretty sure I know what he was DOING."

The Olympics Opening Ceremony: So Much Neon Green

It's not unwelcome. Just a surprising designer mind-meld.