Mandatory Credit: Photo by Rob Latour/REX/Shutterstock (9919712ai)
Mariah Carey
American Music Awards, Show, Los Angeles, USA - 09 Oct 2018
Mariah basically stood stock still and sang, and at some point a bunch of shirtless dudes popped up and then proceeded to dance around in the folds of her massive train. With the huge screen behind her, it all LOOKED pretty impressive, even if she doesn't have that Baby Whitney upper register anymore.
Mandatory Credit: Photo by Rob Latour/REX/Shutterstock (9919712ag)
Mariah Carey
American Music Awards, Show, Los Angeles, USA - 09 Oct 2018
I admire anyone who makes it so that her performance involves being genuflected to by a bunch of muscular young people.
Mandatory Credit: Photo by Stewart Cook/REX/Shutterstock (9919711af)
Mariah Carey
American Music Awards, Press Room, Los Angeles, USA - 09 Oct 2018
Obviously Mariah changed later into something see-through ONLY in the middle of her body. For some reason, this is her happy place.
Cardi B
Mandatory Credit: Photo by Rob Latour/REX/Shutterstock (9919712bu)
Cardi B
American Music Awards, Show, Los Angeles, USA - 09 Oct 2018
Cardigan B started with a funfetti confection...
Cardi B
Mandatory Credit: Photo by Rob Latour/REX/Shutterstock (9919712dv)
Cardi B
American Music Awards, Show, Los Angeles, USA - 09 Oct 2018
... and ended with one, too, albeit less of one, as if she simply scraped most of the frosting off her cupcake.
Taylor Swift
Mandatory Credit: Photo by Frank Micelotta/PictureGroup/REX/Shutterstock (9919897u)
Taylor Swift
American Music Awards, Show, Los Angeles, USA - 09 Oct 2018
I missed her opening performance. Tracee Ellis Ross referenced a cobra? Can it be true? DOES ONE DARE GO FULL SNAKE if one cannot do it better than Britney?
Halsey
Mandatory Credit: Photo by Rob Latour/REX/Shutterstock (9919712ee)
Halsey
American Music Awards, Show, Los Angeles, USA - 09 Oct 2018
She looks like she's in a Save The Last Dance sequel. No, wait, Broadway adaptation.
Camila Cabello in Armani
Mandatory Credit: Photo by Rob Latour/REX/Shutterstock (9919712fe)
Camila Cabello
American Music Awards, Show, Los Angeles, USA - 09 Oct 2018
This is VERY dramatic and great.
Carrie Underwood
Mandatory Credit: Photo by Rob Latour/REX/Shutterstock (9919712fx)
Carrie Underwood
American Music Awards, Show, Los Angeles, USA - 09 Oct 2018
"HARK, WHAT LIGHT THROUGH YONDER STAGE DOOR BREAKS?!?"
Ty Dolla Sign
Mandatory Credit: Photo by Rob Latour/REX/Shutterstock (9919712dc)
Ty Dolla $ign
American Music Awards, Show, Los Angeles, USA - 09 Oct 2018
He must have been very warm up there.
Bad Bunny
Mandatory Credit: Photo by Rob Latour/REX/Shutterstock (9919712dp)
Bad Bunny
American Music Awards, Show, Los Angeles, USA - 09 Oct 2018
He performed with Cardi B. It would have been funnier if he'd sung a Third Eye Blind song.
Post Malone
Mandatory Credit: Photo by Rob Latour/REX/Shutterstock (9919712dl)
Post Malone
American Music Awards, Show, Los Angeles, USA - 09 Oct 2018
I assume this was his bid to join Eurovision. Hey, if Australia can do it...
Twenty One Pilots
Mandatory Credit: Photo by Rob Latour/REX/Shutterstock (9919712ba)
Twenty One Pilots
American Music Awards, Show, Los Angeles, USA - 09 Oct 2018
Full disclosure: Even with all that attempted production value, this was so boring and droning that I switched to the end of the Red Sox/Yankees game which had gotten juicy.
Ciara
Mandatory Credit: Photo by Rob Latour/REX/Shutterstock (9919712go)
Ciara
American Music Awards, Show, Los Angeles, USA - 09 Oct 2018
"Phew! DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY CRUNCHES I DID THIS WEEK?"
Jennifer Lopez
Mandatory Credit: Photo by Rob Latour/REX/Shutterstock (9919712en)
Jennifer Lopez
American Music Awards, Show, Los Angeles, USA - 09 Oct 2018
"Sssh, Clara. No one cares. Dance your sugar plums backstage and let the Snow Queen take over the party."
