
For the record, I am pretty sure the bottom of her dress did not actually look like it had recently caught fire -- I think it's a trick of the camera flash and lighting and whatnot. Although flames licking up her feet would be theatrically apt, given that video she did with Eminem.

This is how I plan to enter rooms from now until the end of my days. First I will wind up thusly...

... and then, I will deliver the pitch. Although mine will not involve quite so much crotch.

Speaking of crotches...

RIHANNA. I said "SPEAKING OF" of crotches, not "PEEKING AT" crotches. And the word crotch has now officially done that thing where I've typed it too much and it's lost all meaning. Don't you think it's one of those words that sounds EXACTLY like what it is, though? Like, what else could "crotch" mean? It just doesn't work any other way.
