Scarlett Johansson

This dress sort of does nothing for me -- it's not super flattering, and the flapping ruffle feels droopy. It's like the elves played a prank on Santa's summer mustache.

Scarlett Johansson

ScarJo also looks sort of tired and rough around the edges. I don't mind her with the red hair, in general (I know it's for her Avengers role), but this iteration of it isn't the best -- and seriously, that is one unkempt updo.

Scarlett Johansson

Nope, doesn't work from the side, either -- and I can't tell if maybe it's ACTUALLY windblown or faux-windblown, to which I say: Who WANTS their hair to look greasy and frizzy? It's why I think convertibles are highly overrated.

Scarlett Johansson

But I do know this: Whatever family of robins has nested in here is going to be very, very happy with all the celeb gossip it gets.

Scarlett Johansson

Oh, ScarJ. Pull it together! You've got the face, and it was free -- now just try to get the rest of it to come back together. Somewhere, Ryan Reynolds is thinking, "This is a GREAT advertisement for the beautifying powers of my wang..."

The Fugvengers

What is up with Scarlett Johansson? Lainey over at LaineyGossip thinks Sean Penn is sucking the hot right out of her, and I'm inclined to agree -- just looking at him makes me tired, so I can only imagine what it's like to bunk with him and, like, share his groceries. Both euphemistically and otherwise. I am especially concerned as to why she can't manage her hair lately. That thing has more flyaways than an airport.