Rita Ora in Nensi Dojaka

Just like...give me a break. This is, in order: (a) a wonderful ad for her personal trainer, (b) literally just a cute bikini for a Valentine's Day getaway, and (c) some random leftover tulle.

Rita Ora in Nensi Dojaka

It's also a thong!

Rita Ora in Nensi Dojaka

And THIS answers the question, "what do you do with your face when bleaching your brows out didn't get the kind of attention you'd hoped for." This overall look feels very "I'm a fairy who appears to the contestants on a very special Love Island," and, honestly, Rita Ora might be a good Love Island host, now that I think about it.

Lily James in Rodarte

MANY people on Instagram appeared to be shocked that Lily didn't go with Versace for this event, and it's true that she did wear a ton of Versace this year, generally to great effect. I wish this had those paillettes all the way down the front...I think?

Lily James in Rodarte

This just has a lot going on.

Naomi Campbell in Valentino

HELLO SPEAKING OF THINGS GOING ON, WHAT NAOMI CAMPBELL HAS GOING ON IS IT. That came out loud and poorly phrased, but you feel me. She looks like a goddess. Which I just accidentally spelled as "goddress," which is definitely a thing.

Charles Jeffrey and Tilda Swinton(in Charles Jeffrey LOVERBOY)

These two people once appeared at the foot of the bed of a man in a fable who had to be taken on a long and arduous journey through space and time to learn that his taste in lampshades is JUST WRETCHED.

Winnie Harlow in Iris Van Herpen

And this certainly feels as if it's appeared in a Disney+ program -- but one of the really good and expensive ones where you wonder if Disney isn't giving notes because it's also actually surprising anti-capitalism.

Suki Waterhouse in Alexandre Vauthier

And this says, "this is great but I feel sad that Naomi Campbell is wearing something similar because there can only be one Naomi Campbell."

Henri Bergmann in Christopher Kane

Google told me that Henri "is a house & techno producer and DJ, with an emotive and melodic sound," and honestly now this makes sense to me. Carry on! (Although on a logistical level, this very simply looks uncomfy in which to sit and have a meal!)

Paloma Faith in Iris Van Herpen

I'm not sure that I'm ready for this hair cut to come back. In full disclosure: I had this haircut in pre-school.

Kristen Mcmenamy in Valentino

This is A LOOK, all caps. I feel like it's about ten seconds away from being the official costume of a Valentino-branded superhero.

Jourdan Dunn

It says something that, on top of all of this, her face STILL pulls focus.

Tan France

I regret to report that I cannot. This feels like a Sexy Pilgrim With Strep Throat costume and, as such, it's at least a month late.

Hannah Martin

The good news is that if she wears this to a rob a bank, no one will be able to ID her!

Sabrina Carpenter in Alberta Ferretti

We are truly living through a season I like to call Maybe Too Many Hoods?

AJ Odudu

And I think we're permanent residents of This Is Quite Sheer! (She does look great in this color.)

Souraya Chalhoub

....is it insane that I do not hate this? The illusion netting matches perfectly!

Shay Mitchell

This is like if a highlighter got invited to a fancy party but....in a way I enjoy. She looks good! (Although she's standing like she's worried this doesn't fit.)

Olivia Culpo

Are panniers...back? I did not expect this. Someone let me know when we're supposed to start putting little ships into our giant hairdos.

Ashley Graham

She's working this, but it is ABSOLUTELY just a very oversized shirt.

Simone Ashley in 16Arlington

To the Fug National who really dislikes the work of Simone's stylist and recently posted an irritated screed on said subject: I just want you to know that when I saw this look, I thought of you and that you would probably not like this. I agree it is not great on her! She is SO gorgeous, I kinda don't get what's happening.

Yasmin Finney in Harris Reed

HUGE missed opportunity to wear the hat!!!

Maya Jama in Sabina Bilenko

ALWAYS wear the hat!

Angela Scanlon

Anne Shirley is going through something right now!

Zinnia Kumar in vintage Yohji Yamamoto

I must confess that the word "vintage" REALLY elevated this for me. And what that says about me is just something I must unpack on my own.

FKA Twigs in Rick Owens

This dress is very cool and she can carry a lot but I think the runway styling might have worked better.

Erin O'Connor

I wish I'd thought to invest in tulle futures this time last year.

Munroe Bergdorf in Tony Ward

This is lovely, but it might feel more Cannes to me than this event, where everyone looks sort of....eccentric. This is definitely not eccentric, although it is LARGE.

Law Roach

Law Roach IS Alexis Carrington Colby!

Raye

This feels like the winning look in a Project Runway challenge where the contestants have to design a dress based on a Broadway show, and this person pulled Wicked.

Jess Glynne

When you want to flash a little leg to the rest of the coven!

Christine Quinn

Oh no. They're gonna fight at the coven over who looks sexier!

Rita Ora Is Back to Her Old Tricks and (Many) More WILD AND THRILLING LOOKS From Last Night's British Fashion Awards

I must inform you that Rita Ora is NSFW.