1. Fernando Mendoza, QB Indiana, to the Raiders
Because he was the VERY FIRST pick, I grabbed a shot of him from the screens at Heinz Field (okay, Acrisure Stadium, but... no). He looked totally normal at home in Florida and hugged his parents a lot, and said only very safe things about what a wonderful organization the Raiders is, etc. Everything you expect. This kid in particular is not gonna be like, "The Raiders are a HOT ASS MESS usually so this could be wild!!!"
No. 2: David Bailey, EDGE Texas Tech, to the NY Jets
The Jets need so many things, how do they even decide. I guess they went on vibes, because this was a surprise pick. The subtle pattern on this suit is super, but it's prophetic that he's making an L sign with his hands and then ended up a Jet.
No. 3: Jeremiyah Love, RB Notre Dame, to Arizona
This is very similar, but with a golden sheen. I hope Arizona can take care of him; he's just the best.
He also gave us our first jacket fun: Those are highlights on the left, and on the right, his own artwork of a character of called Jeremonstar. He also partnered with Sharpie to release a comic book, Jeremonstar: Draft Day Ashcan. Fun fact: An ashcan comic is not intended for wide sale; it's just done to establish trademarks.
No. 4: Carnell Tate, WR Ohio State, to Tennessee
Carnell was quite a surprise, I think. Although the Titans ALSO need guys with good hands if they want their rookie QB from last year to have any downfield success. I love his cropped jacket. It has his mother's and sister's names inside. And no, his necklace does not say HILL...
That's better. And good advice.
No. 5: Arvell Reese, LB Ohio State, to the NY Giants
Arvell was considered the best player available, even though Mendoza was the consensus no. 1 choice. I don't know if that's just ESPN trying to be edgy, or what. He's clearly VERY good and I think folks were shocked the Jets didn't take him. And just when you think this outfit is very straightforward...
... BOOM. It is a TRIBUTE TO REESE'S CANDY. Apparently they have a deal, which makes sense. This is amazing. Although... more Reese cup, fewer Reese's pieces, sir.
No 6: Mansoor Delane, CB LSU, to the Chiefs
This is really good. Not LSU colors; just his own story. KC traded up for this spot, but before the Giants had picked at No. 5, which feels risky if they took the player they wanted? I suspect they were happy with either him or Arvell and just wanted to make sure they got ONE of them.
No. 7: Sonny Styles, LB Ohio State, to Washington
His suit includes a poem, "I Am," that he wrote. WHEN, I don't know, but it's all about the road to going pro. It reads like maybe a high school English assignment, which is not me making any judgment; it genuinely reminds me of an assignment my kids did this year, and it's sweetly prophetic.
No. 8: Jordyn Tyson, WR Arizona State, to New Orleans
"NOTHING TO SEE HERE!!! Well, except I should've tucked in my shirt."
No. 10: Francis Mauigoa, OT Miami, to NY Giants
He's repping his Samoan culture here. He told the AP, “This is the ulafala, and it represents the high chief or the high monarch." Apparently his dad is the chief; unclear if he means that symbolically, like of his family, or what, but it's great.
2026 NFL Draft - Red Carpet
He said this painting represents the American Samoan community. It's so cool -- I love to see the guys finding ways to tell stories about themselves.
No. 11: Caleb Downs, S Ohio State, to Dallas
This is a very, very sharp-dressed man...
... or, make that sharp-dressed FAM.
No. 12: Kadyn Proctor, OT Alabama, to Miami
Purple AND plaid! Love. It's hard to see, but he's wearing a glistening grill, and his medallion says PROC. Useful for this family OR anyone who becomes a proctologist.
No. 13: Ty Simpson, QB Alabama, to LA Rams
I could eat these words, but I think the Rams WAY overspent here. Yeah, sure, you want someone backing up Matt Stafford at some point, but even in a crap draft class for QBs, this is way too high to pick Ty Simpson -- I think he gets too much Alabama glaze -- and I genuinely think he'd still have been there tomorrow when they pick. Crazy. He looked mid every time I watched him play. And all I have learned from his suit is that he has a deal with alo.
No.15: Rueben Bain Jr., EDGE Miami, to Tampa Bay
Quick, someone flick a wad of paper through the uprights!
Too late; you missed your window. I enjoy that his meaningful photo is of an intersection. It's from Brownsville, the neighborhood in Miami where he grew up, and apparently it's a tough one, so it represents how far he's come.
No. 20: Makai Lemon, WR USC, to Philadelphia
Philly traded picks with Dallas to get him -- their divisional rival, no less -- which all but guarantees AJ Brown will be playing somewhere else next year. Not that anyone really doubted it. This suit is snappy.
No. 25: Dillon Thieneman, S Oregon, to Chicago
He looks like the second coming of Tim Tebow.
No. 31: Keldric Faulk, EDGE Auburn, to Tennessee
Tennessee traded itself into the end of round one for him, which has to feel good. I can't tell what color his suit actually is, because it's rust-colored here...
2026 NFL Draft - Round 1
... and more maroon here. Also, this is sweet. He was the second-to-last pick and also the second-to-last person in the green room at the end of the draft. He seemed emotional and relieved and also took a long time to get the hat on his head in a way that he liked, which ... relatable.
Colton Hood, CB, Tennessee
Colton was the OTHER player left, and he did not get picked. He is, currently, listed as the 8th-best available player, so I have to think he didn't entirely expect to go today but is very likely to go tomorrow, so he'll still get his moment. He is adorable. Sir, I will be cheering for you unless you become a Baltimore Raven.
Look at that jacket! I hope he had a BLAST and didn't leave sad. The first eight picking teams have some promising ones in there! Maybe he'll be a Bill! A Niner! A Texan! All good things, sir.