Cicely Tyson
This. Is. HILARRIBLY FABUCRAZ. I have NO IDEA what I am even looking at. She's the world's fanciest tire track.
Judith Light
Well, that's ONE solution to sweat stains. Also, what's with the Paris Hilton pose? Your figure is amazing, Judith, but I promise we can still tell that if you keep your pelvis in joint.
Bernadette Peters
I am a TINY bit distracted by all the criss-crossing over the nude underlay, BUT I love this color so much on her that I might not care. But I will say that Bernadette Peters looks RIDICULOUSLY GOOD for her age or possibly any age, and the "Smash" costumer managed to put her in a gown that showed off how freaking tiny she still is even though it was a more boring color than this (if I remember correctly), so it's a little weird that this one looks so boxy on her.
Audra McDonald
I want to be her when I grow up. Apparently, when she lost the imaginary Tony to Megan Hilty's character on "Smash," Audra tweeted something about how it was an honor to be nominated against her, which is cute. She looks and seems like a classy lady, and her voice isn't so shabby either.
Patina Miller
She won for "Pippin," and I am so glad she did it in something that feels special and unusual and dreamy. My ONLY quibble is that I feel like the bow looks like it should be higher. It drops her waist in a way that's distracting to my eye. But hooray for a floral and a giant gala-sized skirt.
Anna Kendrick
This just looks like it's falling apart around her. I like Anna Kendrick -- I may have turned on one of the wretched Twilight movies the other day on HBO, and with her customary total of ten lines or whatever, she reminded me YET AGAIN that she was the best actor and character in the whole thing on account of how she had no patience for any of those fool yahoos -- and I always wish she could turn it out better than she does.
Anna Kendrick and Andrew Rannells
It is a hot-ass mess from this side, too. This dress had big plans and then fell apart when it counted. This dress is Sasha Cohen in every free skate of her life. At least Andrew Rannells looks dashing enough for two.
Sienna Miller, Tom Sturridge, Phoebe Nicholls (aka Mama Sturridge)
I can't see Tom Sturridge's name without thinking "porridge." Which is neither here nor there, I guess, except that his flavor of porridge is somehow neither too hot NOR too cold NOR just right for me. I think it's just... too porridgey. This look is another one my dad would have dubbed "a lean streak of misery." SIenna Miller looks delighted to be winning this round without even really trying.
Sienna Miller
Okay, I do like her makeup. And the color of her gown (but not the shoes -- come on, you're SIENNA MILLER, and you couldn't be arsed to do anything but huge blush pumps?). The headband is a little silly for me, but it does at least fit her image. Amusingly, one of our photo services captioned a recent candid of these two as "Noted Bohemian couple Sienna Miller and Tom Sturridge," and I laughed and laughed.
Kathleen Turner
I expected Chandler's Dad to be wearing more jewels somehow. And not even jewels. JEWELLLLLLLS. With two syllables.
Jane Krakowski
I kept thinking that Jane's gown was sheer at the bottom, but no, it's just a trick of the light on the sequins. She looks great. Jenna Maroney has only been gone from my life for a short time and already I miss her. I need more RURAL JUROR in my life. Can they make that for real, please?
Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson
Okay, but really, is Tom Hanks still wearing the 'stache for his Roy Disney role, or are we done with that yet? Is he keeping it for kicks? It frightens me. Rita looks classy, though. Remember the time she essentially showed up to the Emmys as the chandelier from Phantom of the Opera? Oh, that woman. I cherish her.
Laurie Metcalf
So we had the voice of Woody AND the voice of Andy's mom? Nice. That dress is quite cool on Laurie -- and thanks to her Jackie years on "Roseanne," it surprises me to see her in anything bombshell-adjacent because I mostly picture her in flannel shirts and jeans -- and so I guess my only concern is that everything is securely tucked away behind her chest fan.
Beth Behrs
Clearly she is the "2 Broke Girls" cast member most game to show up to things to do her part. I feel like Beth Behrs is always there. Got a random gala airing on CBS? Beth Behrs is there. Need toothpaste? Beth Behrs is there. Wondering what Beth Behrs is up to lately? Beth Behrs is there. And this is fine, but she will always be Blonde Lea Michele to me. I saw it once, and now I can't see anything else.
Angela Bassett
This woman will not stop ruling.
Stephanie Block
Considering it, at its essence, is a niftily folded napkin, I really like this.
Valisia LeKae
Valisia was apparently nominated for playing Diana Ross in "Motown: The Musical." And she appears to be in costume as the bouquet of roses customarily bestowed upon one's lead actress after a curtain call.
Patti LuPone
Patti is a big believer in using what's lying around -- like, shoving an ottoman under her skirt for volume, or using an old-school curly phone cord as a neck detail.
Laura Osnes
She plays Cinderella on Broadway; she is dressed as an ugly stepsister who didn't bribe the mice well enough.
Sally Field
Sally: Does my dress look like it's slowly peeling off my body?
Matthew: Yep. Do I look like I'm slowly turning into Nathan Lane?
Sally: Yep.
Matthew: Yep.
Sally: Yep.