2 Chainz proposing to Kesha Ward

Yes, yes, his jacket is cool and for one long moment I thought his headscarf and his sunglasses were ATTACHED and I was like, "interesting, tell me more about this new portmanteau for your head" and then I realized HE IS PROPOSING and getting proposed to at the Met Gala is DEFINITELY the first scene of a rom-com.

2 Chainz proposing to Kesha Ward

She did say yes, even though this photo looks like she's saying, "honey, did you drop something?"

Harry Connick Jr and Jill Goodacre

I don't know how these outfits fit the theme at all BUT WHO CARES NEVER BREAK UP. His whole Insta is about how great she is and I live for it. I DO NOT live for how our photo service called her "and guest." HOW. VERY. DARE. YOU. Jill Goodacre is no AND GUEST!

Gisele Bündchen, Tom Brady

And then there's these two, the human embodiments of the eye roll. Gisele NEVER dresses on theme, and Brady never took a photo where his hand wasn't on her ass. And usually not even where one's spouse normally sets his hand in a photo -- the small of the back, the top of the hip. He sticks it SO FAR DOWN on her ass, half the time it looks like he might grab a whole cheek. PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER. YOU LOOK LIKE A MAGICIAN. (They were just as bad last year and honestly, this feels so over the top. We get it. You're warm for each other's form. NO ONE CARES.)

I did like how Brad Goreski basically started giggling uncontrollably when he saw this and said, "I wouldn't have gone with a turleneck for May."

Irina Shayk and Bradley Cooper

It's cute that they're still pretending this is happening. Fine, I know they have a child together and clearly it was happening or did happen at some point but they never really gelled for me as a couple. Speaking of gel, what is happening on Bradley's head?

Evelyn Mcgee-Colbert and Stephen Colbert

This is BOLD for Stephen, and I like it. His wife also looks cool; they seem to have such a loving marriage that it's caused a real problem for me because I am IN LOVE WITH Stephen Colbert. He is essentially my dream man. Heather and I came up with a pitch where this marriage dissolves because she decides she wants to go live on the space station and it's all very congenial and also she is WAY out of the picture.

Darren Criss

This is an AMAZING jacket and some wise creature on Twitter pointed out that the dude on the arm LOOKS JUST LIKE DARREN HIMSELF and now that's all I can see.

Daniel Kaluuya in Prada

I appreciate that some of the men at this event were like, "yeah, I think I'm going to aim more to the 'Sunday Best' portion of the dress code, thank you."

Michael B Jordan

On E!, Tiffany Haddish spoke for all of us and said that she really wanted to met Michael B Jordan and I AM SHIPPING THIS RIGHT NOW.  

Cole Sprouse

Sure! I'm just glad he's not wearing his Jughead cap.

Helen Lasichanh and Pharrell Williams

As ever, these two look pretty rad. I once saw Pharrell at the supermaket, and he was wearing approximately this much jewelry to buy his deli meat and fizzy water as he is here, so he probably feels very comfortable in this. He was also wearing a hat -- it was not THE Hat, but it was A Statement Piece.

Colin Firth and Livia Giuggioli

Firth looks utterly Firthian; Livia looks STUNNING in this. She looks like a high priestess of a very neat cult.

Shaun White

Shaun White kinda looks like an old man you'd run into after church, when you pop by the deli to pick up some cheese.

Donald Glover in Gucci

He always is beautifully attired;  he's also seemingly there to remind us that Gucci isn't wholly nonsensical.

Jared Leto in Gucci

I honestly feel like Jared dresses like this ALL THE TIME. This evening must have been so relaxing for him!

Lewis Hamilton in Tommy Hilfiger

In which Lewis Hamilon prays that someone has a Tide Pen because he just knows he cannot make it through the night unblemished by sauce or wine.

Andrew Garfield in Tom Ford

I really like this and also think he looks like a 1950s lounge singer. But like a successful, rakish one who will never love again after his ambition cost him the girl of his dreams. You know the kind.

Idris Elba

Unstated, yet dreamy. I'll allow it.

Cam Newton

Heather's notes on this look were just, "Cam Newton!!!!" and I don't know if I can improve on that.

Janelle Monae, John Boyega

I didn't have a full shot of John Boyega, but I'm sure we can assume that he's wearing pants. I do love this photo, though: They look like lovers, wistful for the romance of their youth...a romance that can never be recaptured because Janelle has taken the veil.

There Were Also Dudes at the Met Gala

One word: Jared Leto.