Miley Cyrus

It's the garter around her thigh that really sells it. By which I mean, frosts the crazy cake with buttercraz icing.

Miley Cyrus

She is so excited about her tongue right now.

Miley Cyrus

I feel like we're watching something that she's really going to hate when she's 36.

Miley Cyrus

It just wouldn't stop. All night. Tongue everywhere. That sucker had to be like fly paper by the end of the show.

VMAs Fug Carpet: Miley Cyrus

This feels like leftover Gwen Stefani from 2001, reheated in the microwave of a Claire's Accessories, and then served up in a Bollywood Grease remake. Except not as awesome. [Photos: Getty]