
OMG I FORGOT ABOUT THIS. HOW COULD I HAVE FORGOTTEN ABOUT THIS. Well, the memory probably seared off my frontal lobe.
My Gucci Nightmares.
My Gucci Nightmares, Part 2: Mardi-Gras Slacks.
I want ti line it and redesign it and then I might be in love. But that's a LOT of caveats.
Don't you feel like Kate Moss shouldn't be doing something that everyone else had already done? I mean, to some degree obviously that's impossible; everything has been done before on some level. But the only reason to wear something this witchy to an outdoor art gala is if you think it's making a dramatic statement, and zzz.
Sexy Witch is also not my favorite look on Dakota.
I get the giggles every time I see this. What are you DOING, child?

Not an effective use of her legs.
Not an effective use of her cuteness.
This woman wore some seriously questionable stuff this year. There was stuff that was more blatantly see-through, but for some reason the one that bugs me the most is the one that feels like it's trying to be something it isn't.

Garishly wrong. And she may be realizing it right here.
You think the dress is as bad as it can get, and then you reach the shoes.
Looking into pants does not mean stepping into DOUBLE PANTS. I'm sure it's just an optical illusion, but still. It's an optical DELUSION. In the sense that it's not as cool as she thinks.
... Is that a Champagne coozy built into her pants?

Every pair of pants I see in this slideshow, I think, "Those are the worst pants in history." They might ALL be, equally, the worst pants in history.

These are certainly up there. Or down there, as it were. Thees might be worse than Kim's pants. Kim, write Justin a thank-you note.
No, girl.

And a Fug Madness seeding was born.
In my prep document making note of different outfits, I pasted this link and wrote, "WTF is Gwyneth wearing?!?" I ask it again.
The good news stops at her necklace. Even "American Hustle" steered clear of this flavor of retro.
Her adherence to sheer pants is Hudgens-ian in its consistency. That is not a compliment.

Abigail squeaked this one in right under the wire. I think it's made us all believe a little bit less in stripes.
I still don't understand why her back is dressed as Jesse Tyler Ferguson's neck.

Paula, you trippy, woeful delight.
Lest you think we love her wardrobe unreservedly, this was a misfire all around. Except maybe for the color.
Welcome to your honeymoon trousseau, Olde Tymey Bride.
Some of you really liked this. I still really, really don't. Every proportion on it is strange, and the overlay looks so muddy and cheap.
Not an effective use of the bottle of WIte-Out she found while cleaning out her desk. (She wore this to meet royalty. CHOOSE BETTER.)
She made it particularly hard for us to choose this year. This is pretty awful...
... and this is also a travesty. Two very different forms of fuggery; equally unflattering.
Alyssa, stop posing and pick up your traffic sign. Some children need to cross the runway safely.
Of all her midriff looks this year, this is my least favorite because it's not even trying. It's a sports bra. Her navel is used as an accessory.
Again, there is seriously no design here. And not much fabric either.

There is at least a surplus of fabric HERE.
The worst. She is SO PRETTY. WHY. Even if it turns out she was Secretly Pregnant, she has done the uterine secret thing so much better in the pat.
When we implored her to put down the rompers, this is not where we hoped it'd go.
If it's going to confuse people into thinking your seams have popped, leave it on the rack.
With all due respect to scoutmasters, MIchelle Dockery should not be going anywhere looking like there's a jamboree missing its leader.

WHAT IN THE FRESHEST HELL IS THIS.
Much like everything she's ever done on NBC, Megan Hilty deserves better than this.

Awful makeup, strange lace thing. Proof that a bad outfit doesn't have to be ELABORATE in its awfulness; just COMMITTED.
That dustruffle is on my guest bed right now. Furniture and Rooney Mara shouldn't have that much in common.
Careful. Laura Linney runs her classroom like a prison and she WILL whack your palm with a ruler if you break your slate over someone's head.
Had these two halves even MET each other before they landed on her body? Is it a bad fashion blind date?
Tough to pick my least favorite of all her shenanigans, but this tulle sneeze is pretty convincing.
We put a Megan Hilty version of this in our Cut slideshow, but there were lots to chose from, and honestly, each one had an argument for why it was the most awful. This one looks like it's employing bike shorts for modesty.
This one almost bumped Hilty out of the Cut slideshow, but ended up here because despite being totally crotchtacular, at least think the pattern on the dress and the hem is not awful.
I am speechless.
The cameltoe-crotch look really ices this crack cake.
This looks like the novelty entertainment at a really tacky birthday dinner for some dude turning 50.
Kim Kardashian can't feel TOO bad -- Givenchy ALSO sent Beyonce to the Met Ball looking like a massive sofa, although this one is Satan's chaise longue in his dressing-room in Hell.
Linda Evangelista in her most provocative modeling role yet: As the twelve-year old who would become Elizabeth I.
This ALSO could not be more flattering. How many people misread "rock and roll" as "rock and royal"?
I think Gwynnie read last year's invitation by mistake and showed up in Schiaparelli pink. It would've been awful then, too.
And not just gold bike shorts -- gold bike shorts she has ALREADY WORN.
And let's not repeat her name just in case she's embarrassed. This rando showed up at a Star Trek premiere in Australia and I can't let the outfit pass by without another WTF head-bang.
I am so over outfits that are shaped like Darth Vader's Imperial Star Cruiser.
The Easter Bunny's concubine.

Almost as confusing as the time she wore blackface, although this is mercifully only offensive to eyeballs and not to the world.
She has a great bod, but I don't care for how this dress is displaying it.
She looks like spices wrapped in cheesecloth that I just dropped in a vat of cider.

Noooooo thank you.

Hideous, overwhelming, ill-fitting..

She is wonderfully subtle.
I really think she and Kim Kardashian look like sisters and are possibly fashion spirit twins. Which is bad because we REALLY don't need any more Kardashians, much less Kardashian-Lites.
