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Chloe Grace Moretz

I'm sorry. but since when are you Rooney Grace Maratz?

Brooklyn Beckham and Chloe Grace Moretz

This feels manufactured to me, but what do I know. They were dating, then they weren't, now they are... that ALSO, in fairness, sounds like something called Being A Teenager. So whatever. I want to focus more on Chloe attending this premiere with not just BB, but her mother and FOUR BROTHERS, all of whom let her leave the house in a glorified bra. I don't know why they didn't BURN IT TO THE GROUND and force her to choose something actual.

BB and CGM

Chloe, of course he's staring straight ahead. YOU LOOK LIKE A HUMAN GARTER. IT'S AWKWARD.

Chloe Grace Moretz

At least her shoes are good.

CGM

Her tattoo, though... I mean, am I nuts, or is it unusual for a 19-year old to have baby footprints tattooed to her sternum? It seems to be an "In Memoriam," so I'm loath to criticize it because everyone grieves in their own way, but... it's intriguing, and to reveal it feels very intentional. For whatever reason. I can't begin to imagine.

What the Fug: Chloe Grace Moretz in Alexander McQueen
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESSICA. Chloe Grace Moretz got you a shitstorm for your special day. [Photos: Getty]

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