Julianne Hough in (vintage) Jenny Packham

I'm not sure HOW vintage Jenny Packham can really be -- the brand isn't THAT old -- but this DOES feel very 2004.

Constance Wu in Marchesa

She has trained me to expect to be OBSESSED with whatever she's wearing and instead here I only feel vaguely positive.

Kaley Cuoco in Tommy Hilfiger

She mad her own "golden globes" joke about her cleavage on her Instagram, so I won't. I actually really like this dress, although I think the deep v might be a little too wide?

Leighton Meester in Galvan

She looks swell -- and I love the blue shoes. I miss you, Blair Waldorf.

Hannah Simone in Tommy Hilfiger

She looks charming! I like Hannah very much. Do we think this needs...one more little piece of stying?

Malin Akerman in Yanina Couture

There is a LOT happening here. Those look like craft stencils glued to her boobs.

Lisa Rinna in Mark Zunino

Oh, Lisa. As someone who has watched every minutes of RHoBH I can say without any hesitation that she wore this dress at least in part so that we all know she's not wearing any undies.

Anne Heche

A red lip, Anne. YOU NEED A RED LIP.

Elle Fanning in Prada

This is elegant on her. I might have gone for a different shoe?

Golden Globes 2017 Post-Parties: Women in White and Silver

When in doubt, go bridal. [Photos: Getty, Fame/Flynet]