Jenna Dewan Tatum in Azzaro

Let's start with the good. That is just really, really excellent on her, and the shoes are my happy place.

Heidi Klum

And yes, this is very preductably Thighdi Klum, but she easily looks the best out of her cohorts and she's at least balancing it out by keeping everything else under wraps.

Raise your hand if you saw THIS much coverage coming.

Howie

Finally, he dresses for the occasion.

Derek Hough

And this is... fine. He looks clean, but there's something about his jeans that seems hemmed a HAIR off, and I don't THINK his sleeves are rolled up, which means it's possible that once he straightens those out they are still 3/4 length.

Tyra

This is basically the most normal thing she's worn all season, right? It's an extremely expensive quilt -- it's like Rayna Jaymes's bed from Nashville -- and a bodysuit, and yet in Tyra terms, it's downright regular. (I'm not all-in on Blond Tyra, though. I think it plays really Soap Opera on her.)

Tyra in Maison Alexandrine

And this has veered into Cockamamieville. She is, in fact, the superheroine who defends Cockamamieville against onslaughts of sartorial sanity.

Mel B

"NOT SO FAST BANKS. WEEHAWKEN. DAWN. GUNS. DRAWN."

Mel B

This see-through catsuit has both ANKLE ZIPPERS and THUMB HOLES. It has flourishes no one knew was necessary.

And it has wedgie.

J.Lo in David Koma

"HOLA LOVERS. Maybe America's got talent, but WORLD has got LOPEZ. THINK ABOUT IT."

"And this is my plus-one. YOU'RE WELCOME, ALEX."

America's Got Talent Outfugs J.Lo's World of Dance

Oddly, Heidi Klum is not directly accountable for any of it.