Sienna Miller in Ralph Lauren
This fit is as poor as Lupita's red cape-dress was immaculate. Crazy to think they were tailored by the same company. That bodice is catastrophically awful on her. It cries out for a necklace to help, and got no aid; worse, the purse is out in left field staring at the fans instead of watching the at-bat, and her hair didn't even get done. That lipstick is stuck trying to carry this all on its own.
Melissa George in Schiaparelli
I don't hate this as much as I did a minute ago, before I wrote about Sienna's bodice. Her lipstick and earrings ARE doing enough to make this effective, I think, even though the dress itself will always be too tulle-heavy to really captivate me. I never think it is as ethereal and regal as designers want it to look.
Charli XCX
No, but seriously, did she hit her head on the toilet seat and then wake up with three new stylists' phone numbers?
Izabel Goulart
I like the dress, but that NECKLACE. That necklace is everything.
Zoe Kravitz in Vionnet
Effortless. In the sense that she may have put forth zero effort.
Mary J. Blige in Versace
Oh, Mary J. You've got the bracelet. You've got the glitter. Bring your head to the party, please.
Gigi Hadid in Tom Ford
I bet Julianne Moore said no to this one, and so it went down the line. SO MUCH BREAST.
Chanel Iman
That's glamorous -- much nicer than I would have thought with so much brown tutu at the bottom.
Liu Wen
Does her gown say "BOOM" on it, right above a picture of a pepperoni pizza? Or am I hallucinating? Is she mic-dropping with emojis?
Joan Smalls in Givenchy
This is Givenchy. Droopy, dreary, forgettable Givenchy.
Lily Donaldson in Saint Laurent
When Dakota Johnson wore the white version, I wrote that there is more glamour in my sock drawer. That was due in large part to poor fit and even worse styling; Lily at least has the last part on classy lock, but I still think the width of that vee neckline is too expansive to be anything but obvious.
Sara Sampaio in Alexandre Vaulthier
Whereas she manages to make this look elegantly sexy.
Isabella Rossellini
Isabella is all, "I don't have time for your pizza and crackers and snack cheeses. Choir robes will do JUST FINE."
Eva Herzigova in Dior
Eva used to be one of the perennial nakeds at Cannes, and now she's in a sequined turtleneck dress. See? PEOPLE CAN CHANGE.