You've seen the top thirteen finishers; now let's get to the dregs, which include Sexy Butter Churning, some truly special lyrics, and a man with very surprised hair. 14. Poland: Donatan & Cleo, "My Slowianie (We Are Slavic)." 62 points. Let's not
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The Eurovision Song Contest, which we have been covering for many moons now, is an annual explosion of the very most mediocre that global music has to offer: some good, some terrible, some INSANE, many nonsensical. And it has this amazing power of NEVER being on at a time when
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View the gallery Welcome to Cezar of Romania. He may change your life. In a year when Eurovision felt low on enduringly pointless theatrics (no, I'm not talking about you, Random Viking; you were a beautiful mystery), the likes of Romania and Montenegro and, for ten glorious seconds,
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View the gallery Watching Eurovision this year (for our past coverage, and a primer on what the heck it is, click here; you will fall in love) made me realize Stefon from Saturday Night Live should do the ad campaign: "Europe's hottest telecast is: EUROVISION. It. Has.
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View the gallery All weekend, we were watching tweets trickle in about our beloved Eurovision Song Contest, the drunky-funky festival in which a bunch of nationally chosen musical acts represent all the most cracked-out, smacked-out, whacked-out aspects of their home countries and then are voted into
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